Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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