gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
