better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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