How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
you traded sex for a burrito?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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