just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
