Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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