But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
