We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
