So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
When did we convert life to cartoon?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize