i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
