on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
How does one acquire holy water?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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