you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
