Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
