Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
