Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
