Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize