fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
only you would photoshop your dick
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
