In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
