oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Randomize
