Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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