Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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