I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
