I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
