yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I can't turn off my feet"
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
