i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
