She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I lost the right to judge tonight
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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