i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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