i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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