do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
