No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize
