so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
