we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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