I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
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