I wish I could punch you in the face.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
