She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize