Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize