No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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