Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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