What a fucking waste of an outfit
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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