No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I think your dad took our porno
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
