After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
