So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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