She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
