Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
whose parrot is this?
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
