All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
