ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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