what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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