every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize