names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
