So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
one two three fourrrrnication!
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
tell me about the fingering
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
