There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
