Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
